Day 6 - Lake Garda

Nice relaxing day today. Woken up ungracefully by the wind ripping a tent peg out of the basha so it started flapping against the tent. Secured it to some railings with tie wraps then back to sleep until about 10am.

Popped a few headache tablets to try kill the headache that i woke up with. The heat is nice but my body really can't cope with it and my head was complaining.

Called in to see Francesca and sort out the paperwork then took the stove and breakfast down to the lake. Dived in while the coffee was brewing then jumped straight back out shouting obscenities. Damn it was cold.

Polished off a steady stream of tea and coffee then back up to the tent to clear some washing. Figured this is one of the few places I'm guaranteed good drying weather so did the lot.

I was just in time to catch the resident Piaggio Ape (pronounced 'appy, apparently) make his trip up the slope to collect garbage from the top pitches. They've only got 50cc moped engines so the driver needs a huge run up, which he starts from outside the campsite gates. It's an amusing everyday occurrence.

Piaggio Apes are one of the coolest things on the road in Italy. Those and the original Fiat 500s, of which there are loads still running over here. Don't think I've seen any new ones here though. And Fiat Pandas. They make perfect sense over here.

Sparked the bike up and went for a little spin through Riva del Garda and into the James Bond tunnels. Sunday afternoon traffic was a killer, especially with coaches dumping tourists outside hotels, so I turned back just before Limone. The bike didn't feel right, which concerned me for a short while, but then i twigged it's ramped up for the weight of full luggage and i was obviously travelling light.

Took great pleasure in riding in jeans and t-shirt and feeling the cool breeze on my skin. I just pulled boots, helmet, gloves and earplugs from the pile of sweaty gear. The northern end of the lake is surrounded by mountains so it's naturally cooler. The west side had fallen into afternoon shade so was cooling down nicely. I still saw 28 degrees on the dash, but it was rather pleasant.

Enjoyed mixing it up with the Italian girls on scooters around the lake. They're fearless. They effortlessly cut up traffic wearing skimpy little outfits and looking stunning. I also realised that if i ride with my helmet flipped up and stick on a pair of raybans, i look Italian. It's like a Mr Ben quick change. No shades, idiot Brit. Shades, Italian gigolo. Magic.

Called into a gelateria in Riva. A scoop of pistachio and a scoop of cherry (amarena) in a waffle cone. Without doubt, it's the best 2 euro I've ever spent. Dumped the bike on the pavement and claimed the table next to it. It was busy with Sunday trade, both local and tourist. The poor bike looks like it has been around the world. It's absolutely blathered after riding through bad weather and muddy roadworks earlier in the trip. It's also got the only British plates I've seen since arriving in Italy. It drew a small crowd of admirers, which i acknowledged, but I'm afraid i was far too busy enjoying my ice cream for any small talk.

Stopped for fuel. I'm sure in time to come this will sound cheap, but £1.56 a litre is par for the course in Italy. Easily the most expensive petrol I've ever seen or bought.

Picked up provisions from the Coop. Sausages for tea. Sausages and cheese and bread. And beer and crisps. My body is craving greens so i compromised and picked up some lettuce and tomatoes. I'm no consumer expert but meat is expensive here. Salad seems quite cheap.

I was gonna take everything down to the lake to cook but i couldn't be bothered and the Germans in the pitch above me were playing a fine selection of Kraftwerk tunes. Not that you'd want to stereotype.

They're here in a camper van with a small collection of old Vespas. They sleep in the van and their bikes have their own tent. I met one of them at the Coop. Asked if he needed anything bringing back to the campsite, given that they're short on  space and I'm running light. He was fine but it looked a bit of a squeeze.

As a bit of a compromise (with myself) i cooked tea at the tent then walked down to the lake with it. By the end of the meal i couldn't eat any more cheese or meat and ended up picking out bits of salad. A token gesture admittedly, but it was all i could do.

I had my first introduction to Banana Joe beach bar. It looks like a hippy disco boat. You hear it long before you see it, as he travels along the river playing music on a PA and blasting claxons to announce his arrival. I declined.

Bit of a revelation tonight when i found the disabled showers. They've always been there but I've never investigated them. Huge showers with powerful, removable shower heads. Far better than the non-disabled showers so i snuck in for a late shower. Assumed I'd get busted at any point but pleased to report that i got away with it.


24 miles

Day 5 - Andermatt to Lake Garda

Showers were bloody brilliant. Worth the camping cost alone. I stayed in for a good half hour trying to warm my core. Overnight i was woken by the cold. -1 feels much colder in a tent. I put on every layer i could find without stepping outside to the panniers but still it was damn cold. After my shower i put on two long sleeve thermal tops, a wicking t-shirt, a fleece gilet and a windproof jacket. A pair of thermal long johns completed my rather fetching outfit. Plus my leathers, obviously.

Popped the kettle and the radio on. Swiss radio is a fairly even mix of Heidi music and (bad) 80's pop.

A couple of Dutch walkers came over to ask about my plans. I said i wanted warm and sunny, maybe the Italian lakes. Lake Maggiore is closer than i though - they reckon 100km. They warned me it's 'only 21 degrees' at the moment though. They were been serious, but 21 degrees sounds like heaven to me.

I loaded the bike and kept the essentials under a gazebo. There's a few dotted around the field over big wooden picnic tables. The campsite is actually ok. My only gripe is that you have to cross a road to get to the toilet and shower block. If there was at least drinking water at the camping side then it would be fine.

Waited for the rain to ease then hit the road. It wasn't gonna stop but the heavy stuff was coming in fairly regular waves. I obviously abandoned any hopes of playing in the Alps so no St Gotthardpass or Nufenenpass this year. Road north east to Chur. I'm wanna end up south of here but there's some pesky Alps in the way so i need to go up and over. I'm also heading towards the Stelvio, but I'll make a judgement call later this afternoon. It ain't gonna be any fun in the wet but i could murder a bratwurst mit sauerkraut and there's no better place to get one than the top of the Stelvio.

Pulled over in Chur for provisions and a break. Stopped at the first place in town -  Lidl. The cold and wet was taking its toll on my bladder and i was busting for the loo. No such luxuries in Lidl, or the garage next door so i went against a bush in the car park. It was either that or wet myself. Lidl was full of people dithering, which wound me up so i left empty handed.

A local chap came over for a chat as i studied the map in the shelter of the trolley park. An ex-pat, so no language barriers. He checked the weather for me and it was fairly obvious i had to get south of the border. An Italian bloke also came over gushing with love and enthusiasm for the bike. This time there was a huge language barrier but i got the idea from his very animated, and somewhat amusing, gesticulations.

From Chur i rode south to St Moritz, over the Julierpass. Last time we were here it was been resurfaced. They've done a marvelous job so full credit to them.

The rain was easing now. My leathers were repelling most of it, although some water was running down into my boots. It wasn't waterproof weather though and i figured my boots would quickly dry out in Italy.

The roads were wet but there was shed loads of grip. Providing you didn't hit any road markings, in which case things got a bit hairy. I caned it past a large group of Italian bikes and pretty much every other vehicle on the road.

Stopped at Passo del Bernina. From here i could cross over into Livigno and onto Bormio and the Stelvio, or south into Italy.

The weather looked terrible over Livigno so i gave up on any sauerkraut plans.

The Swiss police were at the border crossings inspecting every bike. A huge group of Italians were held up at Livigno while their mates bike was being photographed. He had a BMW with Akro cans with the baffles removed. He had the baffles with him and they made him refit them and bolt them in before they took him to their van to process his fine.

I crossed the border into Italy at Tirano, after getting my bike inspected then waved through. I let satnav guide me to Lake Garda. It's south east of here with no direct route. South to Breno then east looked the most obvious route but satnav wanted to take me up and over via Cles. I studied the map then agreed with satnav. Distance and time wise, there was very little in it.

Satnav kept changing its mind but in the end we agreed on Edola NE to Dimaro on the S42, then south on the S239 via Madonna di Campiglio. From Bolbeno, east on S237 to Ponte Arche then finally south to Riva del Garda on S241.

The entire route was brilliant. The roads were dry, it was late afternoon and the temperature was hovering around 18 degrees. The views east from Madonna di Campiglio were superb and demanded a quick photo stop. I've marked the route for future reference.

Rode through Riva del Garda about 7pm then straight into Torbole. There's a Coop here that I've often used and i know it closes at 8pm. I desperately needed batteries for my head torch. I can make do with the provisions I'm carrying but a bottle of local red and some cold beers would be nice too.

The last leg took me to my favourite campsite in Malcesine, right on the banks of the lake. Francesca wasn't around but her mother was and i remember she speaks very little English. I managed to gather that Francesca isn't working tonight. She's just had a nipper but she'll be in tomorrow morning. Her mum thought maybe I'd phoned and booked with Francesca which is why i was asking for her. I hadn't, but she speaks excellent English which would make this a whole load easier. I then showed her my loyalty card which i always carry in the kitty wallet, along with a shopping trolley token. She then lit up and told me to choose any pitch and come back in the morning to sort out the paperwork.

My favourite pitch was free, right at the front. It's on it's own and perfect for parking the bike.

Threw my tent up then went for a paddle. The lake was quiet apart from a German lad fishing from the bank. He was casting to the middle of the lake a spinning a lure back in. I stood talking to him from a few feet out while huge fish swam past my feet.

Caught up on a few phone calls while i cooked tea. Was on phone to sparky when the fireworks started over the lake. Sounded like gunshot at first so there was concern from the other end. It took me a while to see the fireworks but could then confirm all was ok.

I love it here so I'm gonna stay put for a couple of nights. Tomorrow I'll be able to catch up on some washing and then chill for the day. I might ride the James Bond tunnels and pick a few things up from Torbole but otherwise the bike can have a well earned rest.


251 miles

Day 4 - Waldshut to Andermatt

No fox related thefts overnight - everything was still bolted to the bike. So they're really not that cunning, are they? He crept in about 2am and tried to make off with some of Mo's stuff but we were still sat out drinking so scared the little blighter off.

50c for showers this morning. Chargeable showers know the exact moment your eyes are full of soap and that's when they cut out. 50c showers *always* cost 1 euro.

Shared breakfast with Mo. Continued last nights lessons in a perfect cuppa. There's Yorkshire tea, then all other tea. Only the first does the job. Packed him off with a handful from my provisions. White or yellow mug, milk goes in last, semi skimmed milk unless it's UHT in which case it's gotta be skimmed. I think he's got it.

Swapped details just incase I'm ever passing cologne and need digs. Apparently my email domain, fleagle, sounds amusingly like the German for naughty child, flegel. Go figure.

Pondered over the maps and asked satnav to guide me to Altdorf in Switzerland, avoiding toll roads. It's no deal breaker but i want to avoid buying a vignette if possible. It looked straight forward enough. Hop over the border and  follow the back roads. Motorway wouldn't be much quicker but it would be much more expensive. Altdorf is north of Andermatt and the first major town on my Italy map. Once there i can swap maps and go for a play.

First though, i retraced the last couple of miles of the B500 to warm me, the bike and the tyres up. I could have ridden that stretch for hours but I'm gonna head south while the going's good.

Just north of Altdorf there's a group of lakes. My Germany map is too large scale to show them properly and they're too far north to hit the Italy map. They're all lovely though.

Stopped for quick bite to eat by one of them, at a restaurant with a lakeside terrace. Paid 17.50chf for a shot of espresso and a mattersons sausage and processed cheese salad. It hit the spot but if i had the faintest idea what the Swiss exchange rate is then I'm guessing I'd be feeling fleeced.

The huge lake north of Altdorf was an unexpected surprise. It's the perfect intro to Swiss scenery. Satnav took me through the tunnel into Altdorf, which I'm certain is vignette territory but satnav disagreed. I think i got away with it though. I also think i got away with the speed camera that flashed me and/or the car in front of me. The camera was both front and rear facing but only the forward facing one flashed.

I assume William Tell has Altdorf connections. They're certainly cashing in on his name.

The road between Altdorf and Wassen threads over and under the motorway. Even with a vignette I'd recommend it over the motorway.

At Wassen i turned west for a play over the passes while the weather was good. Figured i could do the figure of 8 loop west of Andermatt then ride east out of town on the Oberalppass. A few clicks out of Wassen, towards the Sustenpass, the heavens opened. I pulled over at the first bit of shelter i could find and waited. Eventually it stopped but the temperature plummeted. From the tropical heights of 20.5 degrees this afternoon down to a brisk 1.5 degrees! Then at the Sustenpass, it started hailing. I continued riding to keep whatever heat i could in the tyres but i wasn't setting any records. It crept back up to about 7 degrees but i called it quits in Andermatt around 8.30pm and resorted to the roadside campsite we've used before. It's not perfect, or cheap, but it'll do. As expected, everything in Andermatt shuts down early doors. Thankfully I'd picked up some provisions earlier so I'm sorted for tea and breakfast. For some unknown reason i thought a bottle of ice cold beer would go nicely with tea so i picked one up from the campsite reception. I now have some unwanted Swiss shrapnel rattling around in my pocket, although the beer was so damn expensive there isn't very much of it.

Tomorrow morning I'm either gonna do the St Gotthardpass and Nufenenpass if the weather's good, or head towards Italy if it isn't. I can be at Lake Maggiore or Como within an hour or two. I'd love to hit the Stelvio on Sunday though, which means staying in Switzerland and riding east. I'll sleep on it and make a call in the morning.


165 miles

Careful what you wish for

Ungracefully woken from my slumber by the bloody heat. I'm now officially crabby.

On the plus side, Danny Dryer the crap cockney hand dryer made me chuckle. I think the lack of sleep is getting to me.

Day 3 - Baden-Baden to Waldshut

Eventually hit the road at 2pm. I started packing the tent away as it eased off around 1.30 and half an hour later it had finally stopped raining.

The other bikers put on their oversuits and braved the rain about 2 hours earlier. They headed north back to Amsterdam. They would have got very wet.

A dry line quickly appeared in the road and for about 15 minutes i had good riding. Then i gained height and disappeared into the mist. Proper pea souper fog. I couldn't even see the viewing points at side of road, never mind the views.

I pulled over to throw some layers on, one of which was my disco vest. A couple in a 5 series pulled over to make sure all was ok so gave them a thumbs up.

The B500 south of Baden-Baden is awesome all the way to the junction with the 28 to Freudenstadt. Even in the mist and gloom it was enjoyable.

I took the 28 to Freudenstadt and was messing around with satnav trying to find Titisee. My icy fingers kept hitting the H instead of the I so all i was getting was Tithill in Somerset. Amusing, but not right. Once i had it sorted I came to my senses and noticed that the road had dried and the temperature was up in the lofty heights of double figures. Well almost, but 9.5 degrees is far nicer than 7.5.

The stretch to Freudenstadt is really nice. The road i wanted outta town was closed so quick U-turn to retrace my path. Then another one to call into a little bakery for a bite to eat. Eine grosse pretzel bitte.

Pretzels make the world a better place. Weather picked up and the road was good.

Had a bit of a play with a Porsche panamera as i rode towards Triberg. He obviously enjoyed it as much as i did, given the way he was sliding around. Triberg looks like a really nice place to kill some time. There's a huge beer garden in the centre and it all looks quite civilised.

On to Titisee and Bistro zum See. The usual haunt. Started chatting to a couple from Durham. They were just polishing off a Titisee pfannle, or escalope skillet. They had both had it 3 days running and strongly recommended it. I only had eyes for currywurst, so that's what i ordered.

The menu described it as 'gourmet veal sausage with a spicy sauce', which was bigging it up slightly. It was mighty fine though.

Caught up on a few texts over a very nice espresso and before i was done the heavens opened again. I sat it out on the terrace and it cleared up after about half an hour.

I let satnav guide me to a site off the beaten track at Schluchsee but it didn't look too promising. However the weather was still holding and the roads were bone dry so i caned it to the end of the B500 at Waldshut. The last stretch that drops down into Waldshut was the absolute highlight of the day. I'm tempted to ride back up tomorrow to repeat it.

It was getting late so pulled into Rhine Camping in Waldshut. As the name suggests, it's on the banks of the Rhine. I'm still in Germany but i can wave to Switzerland on the opposite bank. If the weather's bad tomorrow i can buy a vignette and clear Switzerland in no time then enjoy tea in Italy. If the weather's good then i can stick around for a play in the Swiss alps.

The girl on reception was lovely. She directed me to the bike parking and then the tent area. They're not together but she let me ride through and park in the pushrod shed right next to my tent.

She cleared up the mysteries of 'tschuss' for me. I though people were saying cheers as they parted but now i know the truth.

I asked about mosquitoes on the Rhine. Sounds like it's normally a nightmare at this site but she said it's far too cold at moment so no worry. I think that was good news. Foxes are an issue though and she pointed out the big warning on the welcome leaflet. They creep in and steal food and shoes during the night. I was advised to leave nothing unsecured outside the tent.

As i peeled my boots off at the pitch i struggled to imagine why any creature would want to steal them.

I staked claim to a huge patch of tent real estate. It was getting late so knew nobody else would turn up to dispute my turf. There's a couple of other tents here but it's reasonably quite.

Got chatting to a German kid called Mo. He's on his way back home to Cologne. In a canoe. A 50 year old folding canoe that he bought off eBay 6 weeks ago from a buyer on Lake Constance. It's made of 50 year old wood and fabric. Not sure I'd trust it sight unseen but he's done 100km so far without any probs. Only another 500 to go. On a bad day, with the flow against him, he'll manage 4 or 5km. On a good day he expects 40. Nice kid. He's only 21 but got some stories to tell. We shared them over beers, then i treated him to some Yorkshire tea when the beers ran dry. 3 rounds of tea later, at 2.30 in the morning, i was spent so called it quits.

It's been a good day today. Despite the inconvenience of rain, I've had a few near misses with the weather but not actually ridden in any rain. The late start set me back but i don't have any set agenda. I'd have preferred dry roads throughout but the wet ones come with their own unique kind of entertainment. I defo need some warmer weather though.


144 miles

Black forest

Bloody weather. Tried to convince myself that the noise on the tent that woke me from my 9 hour sleep was wind, but it was torrential rain. I'm gonna sit this one out. Every time i think about riding through it, i remember the last time i tried the same thing. It was in Geneva and it didn't end well.

I've got the remains of Catherine's awesome lemon drizzle cake and olive bread to keep me going. Plus plenty of Yorkshire tea bags and half a punnet of strawberries. Actually, the campsite shop and restaurant is only 30 seconds walk from the tent but the weather is far too bad to risk that little trip.

So I'm staying put. My tent will be the one surrounded by bottles of truckers tizer.

Day 2 - Zebrugge to Baden-Baden

No idea how they do it but P&O know when I've packed ratchet straps. And whenever i bring my own, they have them onboard. Whenever i travel without, they give me a crappy piece of blue rope.

They've also replaced the proper bars of soap in showers with those plastic squirty soap dispensers. The type that break after 6 months and can be seen in all their useless glory in Premier Inns throughout the country.

Woken at 5am this morning. Or 7am, as P&O liked to call it. Need to get my head around time difference. Bright sun, thin curtains, loud tannoy.

Hit the motorway for the usual long dull slog outta Belgium. Headed south east towards Luxembourg. By Brussels, or Luxembourg at the latest, you can usually get a handle on the weather and aim for the good stuff. No concrete plans but as far as i was concerned it was always gonna come down to koblenz/mosel or black forest or south east France this year. Weather looked good all round so decided to split it down the middle and head to the black forest. Providing the weather is kind, it's guaranteed laughs.

Loads of roadworks in Belgium. Actually, most of holdups were caused by tractors cutting grass in central reservation of motorway. Saw one car nearly twat into back of a tractor but thankfully he clocked it at the last minute. Big holdup just before Luxembourg. A lorry had gone into back of another lorry and then apparently caught fire. Most of the stationary traffic parted to let me through. A few Belgians didn't see me but i guarantee every single French driver threw themselves in the gutter, including lorries and buses.

Stopped for a tank of cheap fuel in Luxembourg. Right hand was completely numb from vibrations and i was feeling the chill long before i stopped. 17 degrees is usually right enough, but factor in several hours of 90mph wind chill against unlined leathers and it takes its toll.

Jumped off the bike, ripped gloves off, pulled woolly hat and several layers of clothing out of panniers and quickly layered up. As i was jumping around trying to get some blood flowing through my hands again, a German bloke came over to chat. He was sat in the sun, soaking up some rays when i pulled up and he thought I was having a fit or something. Had a nice little chat that ended on the lines of:
'Where you heading?'
'Black forest'
'You'll love it'
'Yes i will!'

He said Baden-Baden is a good place for supplies. Tools, equipment, biking stuff etc etc. Thankfully I'm good but it's worth remembering. He also said the black forest is where lots of Germans go on their jollies if they can't be arsed to travel further afield.

Lots of other motorists in service station taking advantage of Luxembourg's cheap prices. The services was like a cash n carry. I didn't want a huge bucket of rolling baccy for 30 euro, but i did want some food. A P&O breakfast takes you a long way, but that was hours ago. Picked up a rather sorry looking ham, brie and walnut sandwich but thankfully it was delicious. It certainly tasted far nicer than it looked.

The toilets were completely open plan which was quite a surprise. I'm reasonably well travelled so I'm familiar with squat & drops in Europe, open pits in the mountains of Canada and tiny saloon doors on cubicals in the States. Urinals in full visibility of everyone in the service station were a new one on me though. Anyway needs must. Bear in mind the French have no shame and go wherever and whenever they need to. At least i make the effort to find a tree.

Suitably refreshed i cracked on to the black forest. Motorway to sarre-union, including two short stretches of paege totalling 2 euro. I noted last time that getting past sarre-union was a chew on but couldn't recall how bad. It's not tricky, just tedious. You've gotta ride past it then double back and try to avoid sat nav forcing you back onto motorway. Once you're on the back roads it's quite pleasant. Lots of pretty little villages and old rusty tractors. A nice way to chill out after a day of motorway though.

There's a few speed cameras though and they're rear facing ones so bikers beware. We Brits paint them bright yellow and put them high on poles for all to see. The French paint them grey and hide them in bushes. There was a lot of coppers out on the roads today too. Catherine recently warned me that a French copper catching you at more than 40km/h over the limit will confiscate your licence immediately at the roadside. Fingers crossed i wasn't a naughty boy today. I triggered smiley faces at every speed sign in the villages, which is what counts as far as I'm concerned.

Crossed the Rhine on that cute little roll on roll off ferry. I rolled up as they were about to leave and the pilot pulled away as soon as my wheels hit the deck. I felt like kitt pulling into the back of his trailer.

Stopped a few clicks short of the campsite for provisions. A handful of cold stubbies from the beer fridge and some sausages, cheese and bread would make for an easy tea. I grabbed a big punnet of local strawberries too. They turned out to be lovely. I gave the local white asparagus a miss though. I love asparagus but tonights tea doesn't have any fresh veg on the menu.

I used Adam camping plaza again. Same lady on reception. I recognized her. She didn't recognise me. She's as lovely as always though. Friendly, but uber efficient.
'One bike?'
'Ja'
'One person?'
'Ja'
'One small tent?'
'Errr... ja!'
Well i guess it's small compared to a marque. The tent's fine. The basha is huge but i think i got away with it! 10 euro.

Pulled up next to four other bikes and bikers. Brits, although the one lass lives in Amsterdam. Parked up, helmet off, pulled a cold beer out of the pannier and had a beer with them. They've just come from Lake Constance and they're on their way home. They've had crap weather and been eaten alive by mosquitos. I'm hoping for better.

They went for showers. I put the tent up and cracked on with tea. I brought my little battery radio this year so i cooked tea to German radio. It's quite listenable, but not up there with French rock radio.

Noticed the dog wash while i was washing my pots. There's a dedicated room next to one of the two toilet blocks. It's got a huge sink and a shower hose. Great idea, especially when you're staying on a site with a huge lake.

The room is labelled hundsbad, which looks an awful lot like 'bad dog' to me!


356 miles

To absent (minded) sisters

On the ferry, washing down the spectacular P&O buffet with a nice pint of hoegaarden. Sun is shining, bike just been serviced, tank full of juice. Europe here i come! Cin cin sis.


46 miles

Isle of Man TT 2013

A safe return to the Isle of Man this year with Deano. Chuffed to report that I've returned with all limbs intact after a spectacular week of racing.

I'm keeping the ball rolling and just booked a last minute ferry to Zebrugge for the annual hoof around Europe. It's a solo flight this year so no stress and lots of spare room in the panniers!